Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
