i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I want her autograph on my taint
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
