Pants 0. Shit 1.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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