Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
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