Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
i've created a new STD.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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