if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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