hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
