These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
