yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
she looked like the before picture.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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