You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
