Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
