i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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