Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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