Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
