please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
