New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
