I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
