I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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