my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
