these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
