You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
