Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
