you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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