I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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