Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
please come you make the beer taste better
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
porn star boner night. come get it.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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