i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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