i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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