Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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