i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
