Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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