Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
