i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize