i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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