I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
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He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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