The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
