a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
