and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
He did a backflip because drugs
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize