so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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