I puked a lego.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize