I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize