I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
