you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
