I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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