WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize