Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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