a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
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her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
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Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
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