Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
