Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
