Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
