Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize